Sunday, May 2, 2010
.|.Verge Of Breaking Down.|.
I cried two days ago..I cried myself to bedfor the past two days...I don't know why...But I felt so incomplete...I felt..I felt that Ilack of something..Then I realised..How muchhad happened within the 19 years of my life...And how much I've missed something for that time of my life...I cried 'cuz evenwithout knowing how it felt to have a Father,I miss having one to call my ownFather...It would've been 360 degreesdifferent...
To grew up without a Father is a challenge that God hold upon me..I've dealt with itfor 19 years..And doing well...But why now?Why now,when I'm almost 20 that I felt howmuch of an emptiness it has been?After somuch that I have put up with,this is the one thing that has made me a weakling...Ijust wanna cry...I just wanna let it out..I know things happen for a reason..And I know God wouldn't test someone whom HEknows can't bear with it...I'm not complaining..Nor am I blaming..It's just...I wish I couldfeel how it feels to have a complete family,to have a Father..Even though for a day...
Everyday I put up a smile..Everyday I sounda laughter..Everyday I never fail to show that nothing can bother me..Yet everyday,it's eating me up slowly...Lately..I can't endure it..I wish I could run away and go missing..But running away is not going to settle anything..I have to face it and get over it..I know that time can never be turn..I know that I'm not the only onewithout a father...I just hope these sober momentwill go away soon...I so hate this feeling...I don'twant it to further affect me...
Dear God,Make this child of yours a stronger person...Youhave made me a strong person for the whole 19years I've breathed...Don't make me fall down..Guide me with Your love,Your strength and Your eyes..Put me somewhere,where I know I'm worth..Put me somewhere,where I know that I can forgetall that has made me shed my tears...
Jadikan hambaMu ini seseorang yang tegar..Pimpinaku supaya ku sentiasa tidak merasakan kekuranganyang ada pada diriku...Sinarilah daku dengan cahayakasihMu,cahaya petunjukMu dan cahaya imanMu...Amin...2:23 PM Z
♥Lady of Love♥
♥ Nurul Irah Aman♥
♥ I'm Your Funny Girl♥
♥ I Am My Own Style
♥ Extrovert
♥ Vain
♥ Fun-Loving
♥ Spontaneous
♥ Chocolate Is My Indulgence
♥ Coffee Is My Addiction
♥ Music Heals My Soul
♥ Beauty/Looking Good Is My Fetish
♥ Competitive
♥ Stubborn Yet Able To Compromise
♥ Dominant
♥ Beautifully Gorgeous Inside Out
♥ Sugary Sweet If You're Nice,Vice-Versa
♥ Cunningly Smart
♥ I Talk The Talk & Walk The Walk!
♥ Lastly:I Don't Give A Damn About YOUR Judgments Towards Me!Kapeesh?!
♥♥ I believe in believing in yourself.If you think you can do it,then you CAN do it.♥♥
♥♥ If you want something,pursue it with your whole heart,mind and soul.♥♥
♥♥ If you are afraid of failing.YOU have already FAILED!Don't be afraid of failing.Because you can only be better after you failed.♥♥